The pure science of eating peanut butter

This just in... Peanut butter eaten from the jar is 10 times tastier than peanut butter consumed any other way.  This is a scientific fact verified by a team of squirrels.  Do you want to mess with squirrels?  No.  Of course not.  

If you're still a doubter, put your anti-scientific tut tuts between a couple of slices of bread and chomp down.  What do you taste?  Humble pie that tastes like bread.  Ordinary bread.  Would it taste better with peanut butter?  Of course. But doesn't a spoonful of sugar help the medicine go down? So, take away the medicine (that would be the bread) and just enjoy the "sugar."  Healthy sugar.  Not the white death kind.  The tanned, smooth kind that white women not only enjoy eating but want their skin to look like.

Disagreements with squirrels are best handled delicately.

It is a stretch to say many women and some men want to be the peanut butter?  No, we don't think so. Not the jar, of course, just the contents.  Nicely tanned and tasty.  A group of psychologist-squirrels is studying that phenomenon right now.  Stay tuned. Meanwhile, get the spoon.